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Wednesday, September 18, 2019

The day I stop caring...

It has been a while since I last posted on my blog and I feel sad about it.. there's so much I have to write and so many stories to catch up on, it just seems as though life sometimes happens quicker than we realize and sitting down for a blog entry seems like quite a luxury!
Life has been busy.. the kids started school last month, Iggy's travel schedule has been insane and by the look of my daily agenda, I definitely seem to have too much on my plate.. oh well!
But despite the crazy fact that the days have slipped out of my hands like water, I've had a lot of time to think about myself and the personal relationships that I've invested in throughout the years, especially in recent times and in some particular cases pertaining to family members...
I've always been believer in family and have placed a lot of emphasis in having tight relationships with all my family members...extended family included..
Those who know me are well aware of the fact that I am very passionate and give my all in everything I do.  I pride myself in being rather resourceful and helpful to people around me; I am also extremely loyal and a very reliable friend... My grandma used to say the secret to a happy life was to "never expect anything from anyone" and as much as I agree with her golden rule, sometimes I disappoint myself by doing the exact opposite.. thinking that people will be as invested as me!
I've had many disappointments in life regarding people who I consider my friends or family members that I consider caring and I wonder when will be the day when I stop caring...
I've lived through times when I'm excluded from parent activities, not invited to parties of people I consider close, ignored at public events, disregarded in different ways but I recently had one particular incident with a family member that made me seriously question my persistence to even have a relationship with that person...
I often think people can change, I give the benefit of the doubt, I open my heart and forgive but I'd really like to stop caring for people who don't care for me... I'd love to be more detached and less emotional, more realistic and less naive.. I yearn for the day that I stop caring, the day when people who don't love me can't hurt me anymore...

1 comment:

Andrea H. said...

Don’t stop caring as much as you do. I also speak from experience. It’s in our DNA and our hearts. However it’s ok to take a break from others including family. It’s an unfortunate experience but it’s necessary to survive daily life. Hugs